Moving is mentally and physically exhausting. But it can be quite terrifying for kids. This is because kids function through routine and it is tough for them to feel comfortable in a new neighborhood. Also, children take more time to get accustomed to new surroundings than adults. So, the moving process, understandably, could be a traumatic experience for them to handle. It is equivalent to stepping out of one's comfort zones.
We understand the gravity of such a situation. Hence, we brought up a blog post which will serve as a guideline for the parents. This will help you come up with a plan to deal with children when making the big move.
To begin with, the first step should be to think systematically. How will you break the news to your kids? Yes! You cannot just tell them, "Hey, pack up! We got to move". That is a big no. There has to be a decent approach to this. It is only natural to be vulnerable at such an age and there has to be some way to handle this vulnerability element.
First, sit down with them and take them into confidence as early as you can. It is always wise to inform the kids at the earliest so that they get the maximum time to adjust and adapt to the decision. And be prepared for every sort of question and be increasingly encouraging to the questions they have got to ask.
Following this, try to take them to the destination you are moving. This can prove quite a liberating experience for them. Allow them to explore as much as they want to so that they get familiar with both the decision of moving and of course, the new destination.
Most importantly, involve the kids during the process of moving. Prioritize their opinions and encourage their participation. For instance, ask them for suggestions about what needs to be taken and what can be discarded. Sit and declutter with them. Ask them to make a new apartment checklist so that it becomes easy to keep track of the stuff you plan to take along and discard. Or just discuss the packing ideas with the kids so that they end up feeling a sense of belonging with their new home even before having moved.
When it is a long distance move, you got to make more effort. Discuss the information you possess about the city and state in detail. And see if any relative or the real estate agent himself could provide pictures for the kids to become familiar. Cuddle up in a bed with time and browse places and spots like book clubs for the kids to make most of after you have finally made the move.
Many children worry about being the new kid in town and find it exhausting to form new friendships. It is only natural and legit to not wanting to leave old friends and connections. The kids, especially adolescent feels like it is the end of the world and ends up feeling isolated; this is where you need to up the game of communication. This is where you can even instill the good and bad usage of social media. Encourage them to use it to keep in touch and maintain the old friendships.
If you are someone who has school going children, then make sure you yourself have had a thorough research done about the school. Make sure to have a one-on-one meet-up session with the teachers and administrators and notify them of the children's state of mind. This way they would know what corrective measures to apply so that it gets easy for the children to adjust. The children would feel a sense of inclusion and support rather than feeling a social outcast, fearful or alone.
Also, keep the situation as same as before if you have a toddler. The children thrive on predictability. Keep it simple for them. Consider that they already will deal with a lot throughout the move and any attempt towards a new thing will only shatter them. To be precise, it will not be a good idea to transition them to a toddler's bed from a crib.
When you talk about the move, ensure that you focus on the brighter side of the process. For the kids to feel positive, you yourself got to look positive to radiate the same. Say, for example, you might move to a much bigger house than before or the school of the current locality has a way better reputation than the previous one.
Besides this, make it a priority to set up the children’s' room first. This will help kids feel comfortable in the new home quicker. They would get a safe place to settle themselves while you can set up the rest of the house with no added load on your mind.
Your own attitude towards the move will determine your kids' behavior. If they see you stressed, or angry, they would feel the same. Naturally, they would be quite unwelcoming to the decision of moving. Give the entire process an exciting appeal so that your kids feel the same.
Moving can indeed be overwhelming. It can literally make things go haywire but if you take the entire process and focus on it as a family, it would not go as bad as it seems.
Just do the right parenting and see your move turn into a nice, exciting adventure than a boring and chaotic one. Incorporating a few tactics like above during the move would make it easy for both of you to adapt to the new environment and make moving one remarkable experience.